Response to #63 Blue Mind
Prologue
from Siddhartha by Hermann Hesse, pg 87-8
A quote that helped me during the darkest time of my young life.
The river is everywhere at the same time, at the source, at the mouth, at the waterfall, at the ferry, at the current, in the ocean, and in the mountains, everywhere, and the present only exists for it not the shadow of the past, nor the shadow of the future. Life is also a river -- a boy, a mature man, an old man, are only separated by shadows, not through reality. Previous lives are not in the past and death is not in the future. Nothing was, nothing will be, everything has reality and presence.
1.
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| Drinking a Pepsi by the Rocky River 1973 |
That winding, flowing water that goes
where it seems it needs to go
Memories upon memories of rivers
beginning with floating plastic boats
in the Rocky River
and many days just splashing around
jeans rolled up
Canoeing the Mohican
Partying at the bars on the Cuyahoga
The New River, the second oldest in the world
that was a huge part of my life for so long,
its mythology, its preservation, its petrified logs
its mythology, its preservation, its petrified logs
its rapids, its flooding, its morning light
Then to Fort Myers and the Caloosahatchee
Sailing boats and sunsets
2.
And my travels
A hotel room overlooking the Chicago River
flowing into Lake Michigan
Sitting on the banks of the Cumberland River
taking in the Nashville skyline
Eating barbecue by the French Broad in Asheville
The Potomac where history breathes
Taken to the tragedies real and imagined when on
a bridge over the muddy Tallahatchee River
Standing on the edge of the Grand Canyon breathing in
the sparkling Colorado so far down, it's work continuing
The silvery Suwanee, song of folklore
The Flint River where Ray Charles music plays
So many rivers
Blue mind is always present by a river.
It can't be any other way.
Mississippi River Blues
My favorite novel, a boy on a raft
in the Mississippi
Langston Hughes wrote "Negro Speaks of Rivers"
on his way from Cleveland to Mexico at the
moment his train crossed the Mississippi
Poet James Wright was informed by the Ohio
in his hometown of Martins Ferry,
a place I spent a weekend and was
the setting of my 2003
novel draft Fire on the River.
Bruce Springsteen sings
We'd go down to the river
and into the river we'd dive
Oh down to the river we'd ride
Coming of age takes place on rivers.
Joni wanted one to skate away on...
4.
Then I read David Kirby's poem
"All Art is the Blues"
and there is this line:
It's beautiful to paddle your canoe in the river,
sublime to go over the waterfall.
And I write this:
For years I was paddling my canoe as a teacher
but this year it's the waterfall over and over again
Nothing sublime about it -- but...
maybe?
Maybe that's the high feeling
I'm getting from this experience --
practicing being resilient, powering through,
keeping my ability to breathe
and not drown.
Maybe the waterfall is where it's at?
5.
Because waterfalls have been places
of blue mind and prayer
Most notably Brandywine Falls
where I often went to settle my mind
and find my way
And a beautiful afternoon at
Looking Glass Falls in North Carolina
6.
Michael Meade says a teacher has to
stand in the waterfall with her students.
This year I feel we're all carried to the falls
over and over, rather than floating down the
river together. I can't see the future.
At all.
Usually by now I know our direction
I know where the bends in the river are
 |
| Looking Glass Falls, North Carolina |
the rocks we might encounter
Not this year.
Not at all.
Every day is about helping them breathe
Not letting them drown.
Meanwhile I often feel I'm going under.
And I'm exhilarated every time I bob up to the surface.
7.
At 65-years-old and 18th year teaching
I'm coming of age again.
One day I will realize
this was the day I didn't capsize
This was the day the river was calm
This was the day I didn't see the shadows
This was the day I could see ahead,
and have faith in the blue mind of the river
to keep me going, effortless and free.
"Deep River Blues"
